A Letter To Single Sisters

"I am light, I am light

I am not the things my family did I am not the voices in my head I am not the pieces of the brokenness inside

I am light, I am light".....

I love this song is by India Arie and at once ideas started flowing.

Do ever feel alone?

Do you ever feel impatient? Do you ever feel envious of your friends who are dating, engaged, or married? Do you ever question why you’re single and if there’s purpose in this?

Sweet sister, I see you.

If you have ever felt any of these things - this letter is for you.

But before I dive in, I want to remind you of these three truths: You are loved and you have a purpose.

Can I say something that might sound a little bit crazy?

Singleness is a gift.

Yeah… you heard me. And I’ll say it again. Singleness is a gift from God. The apostle Paul tells us in 1 Corinthians 7:7 that everyone has been gifted in different ways. So whether you’re dating, married, or single, your relationship status is a gift.

I am soooooo single and here I am preaching on singlehood bizarre. I am laughing at this. “That doesn’t seem like much of a gift to me.” It’s like your parents giving you undies and socks when you really wanted the new iPhone or a gift card for your birthday or Christmas. Am I right? But here’s the catch: Sometimes what we want is not always best for us. And we don’t always appreciate the things that are best for us. But what’s best for us is anything that God chooses to give us. If you and I really believe what God says is true, we must cling to this truth. Our Heavenly Father works everything for the good of those who love Him (Romans 8:28-29). And “everything” includes singleness.1 Corinthians 7:35 says, “I am saying this for your own good, not to restrict you, but that you may live in a right way and undivided devotion to the Lord.” Paul’s encouragement to the church at Corinth was to leverage their season of singleness. Singleness isn’t something that God gives someone and laughs at - it’s actually a period in which one can live wholly unto the Lord. Being single and without a date doesn’t mean that you’re the lamest one in the room, but sometimes one feels soooooo bad I know cause I am that one also. When I remember God handcrafted a period of singleness to be a time of growth, devotion, and dedication.

The truth is, time is short.

It may seem like the days and the months couldn’t fly by any faster but the truth is that time is flying, and it’s not slowing down. And shouldn’t the amount of time on the clock affect the way we live? Shouldn’t we care about people’s souls and God’s mission? Instead of squandering our days by worrying about our relationship status, shouldn’t we make the most of our singleness? Shouldn’t we make the most of any season God has placed us in? Whether that’s singleness, dating, engagement, or marriage… shouldn’t we be keeping our eyes on the prize? Don’t get me wrong, being in a relationship is one of the sweetest blessings from Jesus. Although I’m not married yet, I know that marriage is one of the greatest gifts from God because of the numerous examples around me. Although marriage is blessed, it isn’t the essential narrative of what we are living for. God so deeply cares about every detail of your life. He absolutely cares about romance, dating, and marriage. But the main storyline, the essential narrative of life is about living washed, sanctified, and free in Christ. The main point is going and telling the world. The main point is salting salt and light so that God’s kingdom will grow exponentially. After all, we have been created for Him and His purposes (Colossians 1:16).

If you’re beating yourself up about your single status, it’s time to stop.

I’m here to tell you that you have been given a gift and God has gifted YOU. The Creator of the Universe knit you together in your mother’s womb (Psalm 139). He intentionally created every little character trait, passion, and physical quality you have. He knows you better than your best friend and your parents. He knows you more than your husband ever could. Do you trust that God knows you and what’s best for you? Do you trust that there can be so much good and growth sown from your season of singleness? This is exciting! God has great plans for you.

My prayer is that you would grasp the purpose and meaning that is in your season of singleness.

My prayer is that you would dive headfirst with an undeniable devotion to Jesus Christ. Work hard and work often on your relationship with your Father. Let the King of your heart fill you with joy.

Wake up each morning with a renewed sense of purpose.

Thrive in the fact that you are free to please God and serve others without distraction. You are loved. You are worthy. You are purposed. Live in this beautiful gift you have been given with your crown held high.